My DP

My DP

Final Magazine Reflection.... (final take!)

What did you learn?

How did you learn in?

Why is this important?

I learned that simple and clear is Good. In past writings I would always try to have a complex idea involved in my writing. I would make an easy and simple idea into a bunch of sentences that wouldn't make sense at all. I simply thought that the more I wrote the more random and weird ideas that I threw in to the article it would make it more interesting. But reading some of the articles that my partners wrote I noticed that the ones with the easiest words and simple ideas were the ones I felt more attracted to. The ones with "big words" and "complex ideas" that I didn't really understand I wouldn't finish reading. I realized that the simpler and easy to read that I kept my article the better would be. I think this is important because if I write exactly what I understand and know instead of writing of a bunch of ideas that I don't get, the easiest will be for the reader to get my message, after all that's what we write for, so that someone not only reads but gets and understands the message.

I learned that there should be more than one hook.
During the past lessons about writing that we've had with Randy the idea of having a hook in the headline or the first paragraph was mentioned so many times that I never realized that we needed something to "re catch" the attention at the conclusion. In other words that a piece of writing must finish strong too. I hearted so many times "leave the reader thinking about it". I now I get that this could be a really effective way. Create "hooks" at the final sentences too. Not to keep the reader reading , but thinking.

Oraginallity and creativity are necesary for an outstanding article.
I know writing clear and right to the point makes good articles, but adding a little bit of creativity to it can make it even better. I can't say I learned this by writing my article, truth is I don't know how to do this yet. But going through my partners work showed me that the most outstanding ones were the ones that had something that no one else did. The use of originality and maybe a little bit of humor can help a lot and can be a hook too. Two great examples to this are Wyatt Watt's article and Luke's Article.

I learned that structure can vary.
Even though good intro or a hook in the intro is always necsery it does'nt have to be the thesis that completes this. In past pieces of writting I would always have the thesis as the intro and explained it through out the rest of the body. But now I 've realized that I can explain the thesis through out the article just explainit well and "making the point" trough different ways of evidence. All of this with out making it dirty or confusing. Just focusing in one point and how to prove it.

I learned a lot in through this project. through the teaching, the writing of my article and the reading of other people's articles, it was all a great experiance.

Reflection take #2

1. Overall, when you think about the big picture of your writing, what improved? How did it get better? Why? The structure in my past writtings used to be always the same.The thesis would be in the intro and the rest of the paragraphs would be somehow conected but all about the same idea. In this article I think I improved because I wrote my thesis all over the place but it was still pretty clear, and the paragraphs stayed on the "same page" but were more related then ever only that each one with a different twist. all the same story in different paragraphs with out getting borring and over repeated. Another thing that i improved in is that This article actually has an "so what?" awenser to it. I give out help from personal expiriance that is explained all over the article. Straight forward ideas of how to not have my problem.

2when you think about the big picture of your writing, what still needs work? What do you think will help you improve? Why? I think I should involve more things to my writting. "connect it to the real world". I should go farther than just what happened and how to fix it, I should look for the WHAT CAUSED IT?, but I'm just to closed minded and think that things happen just because, with out looking for the reason. I should do this because my writting would have more substence to read and would explain itself better with out me using so many words.

3. Specifically, show us something that improved and describe the path it took to get better. You can quote your article, your drafts, link to evidence, etc.
I changed a lot of "ings" the first 4 drafts of article were full of ings ei.
"Choosing an internship that will satisfy your goals and preferences" was changed to "my hope before you choose your internship is that..." another thing that I changed is my headline from "who is choosing your internship?" to "will choose you internship" I made this in a way that woulndt include an "ing" in it and that it would start and finish with strong words.

4. Describe something specific (or a few things!) that you learned about writing.
-I learned that the hooks of the article should be in the begging but they can always be in the end too. The writing should finish strong.

-I also learned that keeping it clear and simple is GOOD. No need to use "big words" or slamer words that only make the article be longer and boring.

- Copyediting. Before this project I would never really pay to much attention to the format of the article. It was more like going to rewrite sentences, go through the thesis a million times, etc... but never payed attention to the way I wrote out the numbers or the miss spellings that I had. But With this proect I realized how important they are because a simple word can change the meaning or intensity of a sentence, or it can make the wrtting look "unprofessional".

Reflection on the magazine take #1....

#1 What went well for me during the process of creating this magazine?

The idea of creating a brand new article instead of using something I already had was awesome for me. Instead of being lazy and just revising past drafts, I created I knew article. It probably took me more time to do this, but I'm happy about it because in m article I tell about some of my experience and how much I disliked it, So I was complaining in a professional way. And another thing that is good is that my article will hopefully help future inters during the process.

#2 What challenges did you face as you moved from an early draft or idea to a final product?

I ran out of ideas. I Had the article done but it still needed another bullet point with help for the reader, but I couldn't think of one. But then Randy's wife help me with some ideas and it finally worked out.

#3 What other examples of work—student and professional—stood out as exemplary and served as a good model for your own work?

Sidney Lampe's did. Because we did the same thing, she wrote an article about her experience and so reading through her stuff and how she kept critiquing even when it was done, it made realize that I should kelped on revising my work.

Internship Photo Essay....

It is Leticia’s first time giving birth. She’s shaking. She’s nervous. Morning sickness, cramps, mood swings, weird cravings, and a mortal fear of her body not being the same again. At the age of 17 she already had to go through all of this. Now all that matters is that little being that is inside of her and it’s about to come out. Leticia’s mother brought her from Mexico right after she found out her daughter was pregnant. She was certainly thinking of a better place for her to live. A better place for her granddaughter to grow up. Seven months have passed now since everyone else found out. And now they are here at the hospital waiting for the receptionist to tell her which way to go. The labor and delivery department is waiting for her now. And Leticia can’t wait to meet her new baby. Lots of stories like this one come alive in a hospital. Most of them full of hope, but there are sad stories too.

Two sisters are about to loose their mom. They’ve been sitting right next to her all night. She hasn’t talk in two days. That heart attack brought her down. And they can not believe it. The strongest woman they now, the one that raised both of them is now dying before them in the hospital bed. The two sisters don’t know what to do they can’t picture their lives without their mama. Yesterday they heard one of the nurses say that they didn’t have much hope on Mrs. Close recuperation. Now all there is left to do, is to wait in that big lobby and hope for the best. And pray for the best. Maybe go to that small chapel inside the hospital and ask God for a little bit more of time with their mom.

Kathy is 79 years old. I’ve heard that when you turn her age is hard to move, to breath and sometimes is hard to live. Last night She had a little problem, she fell of her bed. She lives at her son’s house. Her granddaughter lives with her son also. She’s a not really well mannered teenager. She listens to her music in a really high volume. One of the reasons they couldn’t hear poor Kathy when she fell of bed last night. She was screaming for about 45 minutes. Until her son heard something and came to help her. If it wasn’t because she broke her leg they’ve would of probably put her back to bed, but they had to take her to the hospital. When they got there the nurses where nice. Dr. Collins took care of her leg and she was ready to go home, at least that’s what Dr. Collins thought. Because she didn’t want to go home. She wanted to stay around people that cared for her. At home there is none.

Little Nathan has spend most part of his life in a hospital. The Doctors said that Leukemia was bringing him down, and he wouldn’t last long. Nathan is tired now. He doesn’t have any energy left, he’s scared. He’s Elementary school friends are coming to visit today, but he’s afraid he wont be able to be with them for a long time, he wants to sleep a little bit more before the doctors come in again. His mom has stayed in the hospital lobby many times. Worried about what’s going to happen to her little one. Another chemotherapy session, another day. She’s tired of this but keeps on going for him. Even if that means spending more time at the hospitals chapel than her own house.

It takes only 15 minutes sitting in a hospital lobby to listen to how hard life can get when a health problem is part of it. People that stays all night waiting to hear how that surgery went, or that ran to the hospital because they had a “false alarm” with the new baby. A really sad face comes through that door, but then a happy one walks through the other one. A lot of feelings and emotions throughout this lobby. Happiness, anguish, sadness, fear of what might happen. That’s life in a hospital, everyone tries to trust that they’re in the right place with the right people, and they’ll help them fix the problem. A lot of different things go on in this lobby. Even lunch for an intern. Going through her own hospital story too.

2. How could immersion impact your experience as a student?

I think this will impact my life as a student a lot. The truth is I'm having a really bad experience at my internship. I'm doing my internship at Scripps, and at first I thought that would be good, it was a hospital right were I wanted. But I didn't expect I would end up in the cafeteria area, and with a dietitian as my mentor. I'm not wearing scrubs and taking care of sick people or newborn babies. I'm going to that little room in the back of the kitchen (with a hairnet on) and I'm not doing much. Not that I don't want to I just don't know what to do. My mentor is a really busy person so she's expecting me to do things that I don't know how to do and I can't do them. And of course She's not there to "mentor me" and explain me how to do them. I'm not working with her, or learning from her. I'm just doing EXTRA work in the area. How is this impacting my student life? I like school. I appreciate my teachers. I like people telling me WHAT I'm supposed to do and HOW to do it. So I'm happy to be here. Be back. During immersion, I'll I could think of was coming back and having a normal student life. no more nasty work. Boring useless work. seriously any of our projects can help the world better than internship. This is how internship impact me as a student, I want to be a student not an employee.

My PreDiCtiOnS 4 IntErNsHIp ImMeRSioN....

1. What are you most excited about in regards to your immersion experience? I am really exited about the idea of being in a hospital environment. Why do you feel this way? Because i think i want to be a nurse when i grow up. So being around doctors and nurses is really interesting. Even though I'm in the nutrition department and I'm not dealing with blood, I feel like this will be a good learning experience. And by the time I'm done I'll know if this is really the type of environment I want to work on.
2. What are you most concerned about (what causes the most stress) regarding immersion? The idea of not having enough things to do. People here are really organized, therefore they don't need help. They have everything under control. So this can be kind of stressful, or boring I should say. Also the project. I don't have one yet that is really stressful, they don't need major changes here so I don't know what I'll do about my project.Why do you feel this way? People here is really busy to have an intern, that's why I feel this way.

How do I prove this? I wrote my blog during internship, that's how busy I am.